Originally, I planned on titling this message, “5 Ways to Bless Your Pastor.” But as I started interviewing Pastors and their wives about this article, I realized blessing our pastor isn’t just about doing something for him. Sometimes the biggest blessing can come from what we don’t do.

So, I retitled this blog hoping to truly give insight into what our Pastors want us to know but can’t really announce from the pulpit.

I’m passionate about understanding how to love and support those who lead my church. But I have to admit, I’m not a heroine in this article. I’m still learning how to apply the Biblical principle of 1 Timothy 5:17-18.

“Elders who are leading well should be admired and valued. Double up on the honor shown them; care for them well—especially those constantly and consistently teaching the word and preaching. For the Scripture agrees, “Don’t muzzle the ox while it is treading out your grain,” and, “The worker deserves his wages.” ”

Paul knew that blessing the Pastor was remarkably important when he said these words to Timothy and now to us all.

A wise, incredibly humble Texan Pastor I interviewed yesterday said, “Some would think double honor sounds excessive, but the reality is no one fully understands the pressures on your Pastor at any given time as they carry with them the burdens of many in the congregation quietly and confidentially… This is not work that you can leave at the office, it weighs on you. I believe it is for this reason Paul calls us to double honor.”

So, how do we apply this? Here are some insights shared with me from Pastors and their wives all over the country:

1. Do the basics consistently.

The greatest way to bless your pastor is to be one of those faithful people who attends, serves and gives consistently. This gives such assurance to a Pastor and their staff.

One of the most well studied Pastors I know on church leadership said, “When people do the regular basics and never make a big deal about it, the other stuff you do for your Pastor is so much more meaningful. Some people try to bless their Pastor on their terms and they are loud about it. They don’t tithe… but hey Pastor-you can use our lakehouse with strings attached.”

Let’s bless our Pastor and his staff with the basics. Give gifts without strings. And don’t toot our horn about doing so.

2. Let go of the unrealistic expectations.

Almost every Pastor I talked to addressed the issue of inviting he and his family over for dinner. While it seems like something we’re doing for the Pastor, it usually isn’t the gift they need. More than spending time with my family, they need to spend time with theirs. Bless them with gift certificates. Or schedule to take them a meal and just drop it off- especially during those busy times of Easter and Christmas.

Of course, they will have friends who are close enough where a dinner with that family is completely comfortable and refreshing. But let the Pastor and his wife initiate this. Give them the freedom to have close friends and not feel guilty or exclusive in doing so. One Pastor’s wife said to me, “I think the thing that discourages me the most is people commenting on my friendships. Using the word clique to describe my friendships rather than just being happy I have a community is hurtful.”

Let’s bless our Pastor and his family with freedom. They need friends. And it’s okay if we’re not dinner buddies.

3. Love the Pastor’s wife.

One Pastor wrote and said, “Please give my wife face to face affirmation.” Another said, “When my wife hears negative things about the church or me-it crushes her.”

Another Pastor’s wife gave some interesting insight into how to greet her so she doesn’t feel like a heel for not remembering everyone personally. She said, “It’s hard when people say-Do you remember me? Instead just introduce yourself and remind me where we’ve met before.”

Let’s commit to our Pastor’s wife the gift of kind words. I know as a female leader, when someone commits to me that they will only say kind and affirming things about me, my ministry, and my family-it makes me feel so safe.

4. Don’t assume other people are encouraging your Pastor.

Send those notes of encouragement. Write the email where you tell him what a difference that sermon made in your life. Don’t assume they get plenty of positive feedback-because usually they aren’t.

Let’s commit to not just be someone who appreciates our Pastor in our hearts-but let’s let them know over and over.

5. Keep studying how to bless your Pastor.

Become aware of how your Pastor best needs to be blessed and step into that role. Make it a family mission to be one of those foundational families at church who stays out of the drama, seeks to give not take, and stays for the long haul honoring him all the way.

And don’t forget the other Pastoral staff who serve so faithfully as well.

It’s Biblical. It’s good. And while I’ve got a long way to go, I’m committed to honoring my Pastors with much more intentionality. What about you?

2.  Loving what God is doing at Freedom Church right now.  It is a real honor to be a part of the team.

3.  At the end of this week, Joni and I are headed to Colorado for a few days.  No kids.  No distractions.  Just the two of us and some mountains!  Can’t wait to hang out with my lady!!

4.  Matt Kemp is killing it this year!  As a Dodgers fan, this makes me very happy!!

5.  It is hard to believe that summer is almost here!  I think we are in for a hot summer!!

6.  I’m loving the stage of life that my kids are in.  They are so much fun to hang out with and make me laugh constantly!!

Serving our community is a part of our DNA.  I can remember our initial conversations about what this would look like for our church.  We reached the conclusion that to truly serve the community, we wouldn’t plan major events that would compete with similar events hosted by our city government.  In fact, our approach has been to join forces with them to create events that neither side would be able to pull off without the other.

This has allowed us to have a great relationship with our city officials and leaders.  Both parties realize that together we can do far more to serve others than we could ever do on our own.  It truly is an honor to work with them.

We are blessed to live in a city where this type of relationship is welcomed and appreciated. It’s one of the many reasons that I believe that Acworth is the greatest city on the planet!!

I was a little nervous in thinking about leading the discussion.  Not because I couldn’t communicate the Gospel, but because I wanted to make sure that I communicated it on a level that  a 7 year old could understand.   I decided to ask him a few questions to get a read on how much he understood. I was fully expecting to have to explain sin, the cross, how to receive Christ, baptism, etc.

It was nothing like I expected.  I didn’t really have to explain anything to him.  In fact, he explained it clearly to me.  I was impressed by his understanding!  This did a couple of things for me: 1) It made me even more grateful for those that volunteer in Freedom Kidz.  2)  It helped me to understand what Jesus meant when He talked about ‘faith like a child’.

This was the perfect example of overcomplicating the situation, which I think we are guilty of when communicating the Gospel.  We try to make it way too complex and difficult.  I got the opportunity to listen to him communicate the things that God was doing in his heart.  I learned never to underestimate a child’s understanding.

And that might have been the greatest lesson that I have ever learned from a 7 year old!

In that moment, the Holy Spirit spoke to me and said, ‘Welcome to a move of God.’  It seems crazy to think that we have been a part of 110 people receiving Christ and 108 people being baptized in the last 6 weeks.  However, it shouldn’t be.  We serve a big God who desires to reach our city more than we desire to reach it.

One thing that I try to remind myself of daily is that this is not normal.  I don’t want to be guilty of treating what God is doing as common.  It’s not.  He’s moving in a powerful way and I’m grateful to be a part of it!!

2.  In the past 6 weeks, we’ve had 110 people receive Christ and we have baptized 108.  Holy cow!  That’s incredible!  I pray that we don’t take stuff like this for granted.  God is doing something special at Freedom Church and we will celebrate it!!

3.  I had the honor of baptizing Brayden, my 7 year old son, this past weekend.  I love how passionate he is about what God is doing in his life.  I am really beginning to experience this verse.

4.  The Dodgers have started off the season pretty hot!  However, there is still a lot of baseball to be played!!

5.  Joni and I are going to be going to Colorado in 2 weeks for our anniversary.  I can’t wait to have a week with her!!

6.  Here is one thing that I know is true, yet I seem to forget easily — God ALWAYS provides!!

7.  I love what God has called me to do.  I sometimes think I am dreaming!!  I love my church!!!

Meet Brayden.  He’s 7 years old and my oldest child.

For 7 years, I have been praying that he would begin a relationship with Jesus at a young age.  I have been looking forward to the day when he would make a decision to follow Jesus.

Recently, he has been asking questions about baptism.  This opened the door for Joni and I to have the opportunity to share the Gospel with him.  My plan was to ask him some questions and begin to explain sin, the crucifixion, and how he could receive Christ.  Instead, he explained those things to me.  I was impressed by his knowledge and understanding of the Gospel.

As we were praying, it was difficult for me to talk because I was so excited and emotional.  But probably the thing that was most exciting to me was listening to him call his grandparents and tell them.  There’s just something about him vocalizing what Jesus was doing in his heart.

For the Lollis family, yesterday began like a normal Tuesday, but April 10,2012 will go down as one of our greatest days!  I am so grateful that Jesus allowed me to be a part of this experience.  I will now pray for his faith to grow and pray for the day that my girls meet Jesus.

Is there something that you have been praying about for years?  Keep praying!  God hears and will answer in His timing!!

2.  I also enjoyed celebrating with churches all over the world.  It pumped me up to read each text, Facebook status, tweet, etc.

3.  It’s baseball season!  Go Dodgers!!

4.  I am reading 2 incredible books right now:  The Circle Maker and Jesus + Nothing = Everything.  Both are incredible.  Everytime I turn on my Kindle, it is a struggle to figure out which one to read!

4.  It is so hard to believe that we are only about 6 weeks from summer.  2012 is flying by!

5.  I got an invitation to my 20 year high school reunion.  Are you kidding me? I can remember the days when I would have thought that 37 was ancient.  Now, not so much

6.  Our family purchased a season pass to the zoo this past weekend.  Looks like it is going to be lots of lions, tigers, and bears!  Oh my!!

7.  I’m currently planning a trip to Colorado for Joni and I for our 11th anniversary.  Can we leave today??

I wanted to take just a moment on this Good Friday to express my gratitude to Jesus for dying so that I might have eternal life.  I am grateful that 2000+ years ago, Jesus sacrificed his life for my sin.  Words can’t express the kind of love that was demonstrated on that day.

It jacks me up to think about the great sacrifice that Jesus made for us.  He died so that we might live. So many verses come to mind when I think about the price that Jesus paid for me but I thought I would leave you with just one.

God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. (Romans 5:8)

How are you reflecting today on the high price that Jesus paid for your sins?

That being said, here are a few things that I am praying about for this upcoming weekend.  I hope that you’ll join me.

1.  Salvations:  We are praying that we would see more people begin a relationship with Jesus than we ever have before in one weekend.  We desire to see life-change, marriages restored, and people freed from addictions.

2.  Pastor J.R.: Pray for boldness and clarity as he prepares to deliver the message that God has given him.  Also, pray for protection for his family.  Spiritual warfare is elevated during this time because Satan would love to distract us from the main thing.

3.  Staff and Volunteers:  Pray the same things from #2 for our staff and volunteers.  We have been fasting, praying and working hard to prepare for this weekend and we desire to see God do what only He can do.

4.  Production:  Pray that all of the elements come together.  Blake and his team do a great job of ensuring that what we do on Sunday is done with excellence.  They’ve done a great job of making this Worship Experience cohesive and powerful.

5.  Freedom Kidz:  Pray that the kids that show up this weekend have an encounter with Jesus and also have a great time.  Pray for our volunteers as they lead in these areas.

6.  Guest Services:  Pray that our Guest Services team is able to connect with each First Time Guest.  Pray for God to help us to honor each person that walks through the doors.

7.  Follow-up:  Pray for effective follow-up with every family that attends this weekend.  We want to help them move forward in their faith and get connected to what God is doing at Freedom.

Ultimately, we want everything that we do to bring glory to Jesus!  I am eagerly anticipating what will be the greatest day in the history of Freedom Church!